This week, Donald Trump launched a men’s cologne and a women’s perfume, priced at $199 each and available from gettrumpfragrances.com. "A great Christmas gift!" he declared, prompting many to wonder if they should insert an "r" into "gift". But hold off on the sneer for a moment and dig a little deeper. Could this actually be worth the hype?
Despite initial scepticism, I decided to give Trump’s fragrance a try. To my surprise, it delivered. His website boasts that the perfume serves as “a reminder to take on the world with poise,” and as I took out the bins this morning, I overheard my neighbour mutter, “There goes someone taking on the world with poise.” Coincidence? Perhaps. But it’s early days — bins today, world tomorrow, with poise!
The fragrance, aptly named Fight, Fight, Fight, is marketed as representing “WINNING!” (Trump’s capitals, not mine). A promotional image shows Trump and Jill Biden at the Notre Dame reopening, with a caption proclaiming: “A FRAGRANCE YOUR ENEMIES CAN’T RESIST!” While a survey of his detractors suggests resistance levels remain high, we’ll chalk that up to a small sample size and move on.
Why shouldn’t former heads of state dabble in merchandise? Churchill, in different times, could have been the Chanel of his era, with a candle and diffuser line. And who’s to say David Seymour isn’t concocting Eau de Treaty, infused with cos, romaine, and little gem?
Trump’s Fight, Fight, Fight is marketed as “an elegant floral blend with a burst of citrus,” evoking resilience, confidence, and victory. It’s clearly not intended to make you smell like the man himself (a relief for many). Instead, it’s been “crafted for those who rise to every challenge.” Its “stunning white and gold bottle” featuring Trump’s iconic image and raised fist would look striking on the dresser of any... eccentric loved ones.
Sure, it’s not for everyone, and there’s no law against poking fun. But if you’re seeking a quirky, conversation-starting Christmas gift, this might just be it. And if not, well, Elon Musk’s Musk surely can’t be far behind.
Happy gifting, and remember: take on the world with poise — bins first, world later!
(Adapted from an article by Deborah Ross, published in The Times, December 12, 2024)